This came in an email out of the blue. Thanks to Claire and Jo....

..................English - A One-Sided Language

It had been a rough day, so when I walked into the party I was

very chalant, despite my efforts to appear gruntled and consolate.

I was furling my wieldy umbrella for the coat check when I saw

her standing alone in a corner. She was a descript person, a

woman in a state of total array. Her hair was kempt, her clothing

shevelled, and she moved in a gainly way.

I wanted desperately to meet her, but I knew I'd have to make

bones about it since I was travelling cognito. Beknownst to me,

the hostess, whom I could see both hide and hair of, was very

proper, so it would be skin off my nose if anything bad happened.

And even though I had only swerving loyalty to her, my manners

couldn't be peccable. Only toward and heard-of behavior would do.

Fortunately, the embarrassment that my maculate appearance might

cause was evitable. There were two ways about it, but the

chances that someone as flappable as I would be ept enough to

become persona grata or a sung hero were slim. I was, after all,

something to sneeze at, someone you could easily hold a candle

to, someone who usually aroused bridled passion.

So I decided not to risk it. But then, all at once, for some

apparent reason, she looked in my direction and smiled in a way

that I could make heads or tails of.

I was plussed. It was concerting to see that she was

communicado, and it nerved me that she was interested in a pareil

like me, sight seen. Normally, I had a domitable spirit, but,

being corrigible, I felt capacitated--as if this were something I

was great shakes at-- and forgot that I had succeeded in

situations like this only a told number of times. So, after a

terminable delay, I acted with mitigated gall and made my way

through the ruly crowd with strong givings.

Nevertheless, since this was all new hat to me and I had no time

to prepare a promptu speech, I was petuous. Wanting to make only

called-for remarks, I started talking about the hors d'oeuvres,

trying to abuse her of the notion that I was sipid, and perhaps

even bunk a few myths about myself.

She responded well, and I was mayed that she considered me a

savory character who was up to some good. She told me who she

was. "What a perfect nomer," I said, advertently.

The conversation become more and more choate, and we spoke at

length to much avail. But I was defatigable, so I had to leave

at a godly hour. I asked if she wanted to come with me.

To my delight, she was committal. We left the party together and

have been together ever since. I have given her my love, and she

has requited it.


ANNIVERSARY: two lovers in a hotel room on the cheating side of town and it's Valentine's Day... by Dale Andersen

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