So this was last Friday's front page of our local throwaway, The Ladera Post...
...despite the fact there was a really juicy incident in our community worthy of front page coverage. Seems a mother of two right here in Ladera Ranch was arrested on suspicion she murdered her millionaire boyfriend back in her former life. Now that deserves front page with a pic. But no! The Humpty-Dumpties at the OC Register kicked it to page 3 and led with a real yawner about Adam and Steve, still shell-shocked by the flak from Prop 8, trying to lead lives of quiet desperation in the OC.
This calls for a letter to the editor...
News update. The Ladera Post ran the letter. They left out the "grow some cojones" line, but hey, I got my name in the paper. And in the end, isn't that what really counts?
The final score on Prop 8 last November was: 7,001,084 aye, 6,401,082 nay. That's 600,000 votes short of the brass ring. 48%. And getting from 48 to 50 will be a bitch. Ask any policy wonk.
Truth to tell, 48% may be the high water mark. 48 may be as good as it's ever going to get. Let's crunch some numbers. In the last election, the whites split about 50-50, maybe 48-52 against Prop 8. It was among the Hispanics and the Afro-Americans where you had the big pro-Prop 8 percentages. Strange how homosexuals think of Latinos and Afro-Americans as their natural allies. As brothers and sisters in a common bond of oppression. Just another one of their fairy tales, I guess.
Looking to the immediate future, looking to kick off the post-Prop 8 season on something of a high note (and to get everyone's eye on the prize, I guess), California homosexual activists have some special events planned. One is called "Meet in the Middle" and it consists of a rally/demonstration/happening/whatever in Fresno, of all places.
Why Fresno? First of all, Fresno is in the Central Valley, at the geographical center of California. Middle, get it? Secondly, the Central Valley is California's "Bible Belt" and Fresno is the buckle.
Speaking of Bibles... Homosexual advocacy groups went to great lengths to blame the Mormons for Prop 8's success. And it's easy to blame the Mormons, easy to make them the bogeyman. Easy because Mormons don't hit back.
Fact is, the Mormons are a small cult with minimal clout. How minimal? They don't even control Salt Lake City anymore. The last SLC Mayor, Rocky Anderson, was about as gay-friendly as you can get. Nevertheless, California gays persisted in hammering home the fiction that it was Mormon gold and Mormon lies that turned the tide.
When in fact, the truth all along was Latino and Afro-American voters were the ones who did the damage. That's the truth, but truth is never the object when you've been kicked to the curb and you're looking for people to blame. So in the aftermath of Prop 8, you saw these massive angry gay photo-ops at the Mormon tabernacle in Westwood Village, but nary a peep of protest outside any of the Afro-American churches in South LA or outside any of the Pentecostal iglesias in the barrio.
But happily, the chickens are about to come home to roost. Because there's one other thing I forgot to mention about Fresno. It has a big, big Latino population.
Stay tuned. Should be interesting.
Note: regarding the "bite my pillow" bit. Watch this:
A confidential source close to San Francisco City Hall leaked that the California Supreme Court was gearing up to issue its opinion on Proposition 8 on Thursday, May 21, but decided to delay after getting a call from Gavin Newsom.
Remember Gavin Newsom? The goofy little tool who singlehandedly blew any chance the homosexuals might have had of getting Prop 8 defeated with his ill-advised "whether you like it or not" speech?
Right. That Gavin Newsom.
The source reported that "Newsom reached out to the Supreme Court and asked them to hold off releasing the decision so it wouldn't coincide with the anniversary of the White Night riots."
It turns out Thursday is the 30th anniversary of the San Francisco riots, which erupted when the Gay Community there learned Dan White had successfully copped a voluntary manslaughter plea in the Harvey Milk/George Moscone murder trial. If you don't know who Harvey Milk was, rent the movie.
The ensuing riots in San Francisco on May 21, 1979 caused massive damage from which the Bay Area has only lately begun to recover. Examples of the destruction abound. Here are two taken at random: a claim submitted to the city for fifteen dollars to repair a crack in a Chinatown bistro window caused by flying debris from a rioter's exploding piñata; an estimate of $300,000 to paint over the slogans scrawled on the sides of buildings on Castro Street (happily, the UN, having been deliberately misinformed that the grafitti was a free-form, stream-of-consciousness expression of solidarity with an obscure Cuban dictator, declared it a World Heritage Artifact, after which the city certified it as a tourist attraction).
Nevertheless, it's very possible the leak story is accurate. First of all, Newsom has access; his father is a retired state appellate court judge. Secondly, the smart money has the Court upholding Prop 8; releasing the opinion on the anniversary of the White Night Rights Riot (say that three times fast) would be a bit of a double whammy, n'est pas?
May 23rd update: the rumor is accurate. The Justices agreed to delay the issuance of the opinion until Tuesday, May 26.
When I voted for Obama, I expected the gay marriage thing to be handled with dignity, class, style and taste. Instead, what I'm seeing is an endless string of bucktoothed country rubes who look like they're stopping off to take a leak at a service station on their way to a fish fry at the Odd Fellows lodge...
Ahhh. Almost Spring. Birds chirping. Buds sprouting. Flowers blooming. Bees buzzing. And right in tune with Nature's whimsy in all its wondrous manifestations, we have the California Supreme Court holding hearings on Proposition 8. Yawn.
And now for the contestants.
In the far corner, the Sore Losers from last November back again for yet another dollop of discontent.
And in the near corner, representing the winners, the only man who ever succeeded in cutting Bill Clinton off at the knees.
My first thought was, "This is a fucking mismatch. Poor bastards. It's not even gonna to be close." As usual, I was right.
This from a major national paper:
The arguments on Proposition 8 wrapped up a couple hours ago out in San Francisco. The California Supreme Court did not vote or issue a ruling, but it sounds like the justices are inclined to uphold the law, which bans same-sex marriage. According to the LA Times, only two of the seven justices indicated a possible readiness to overturn the initiative. One possible bad sign for Prop. 8 opponents. Justice Joyce L. Kennard, who voted to allow same-sex marriages last year, signaled she wasn’t a fan of the challengers. Kennard said that Prop. 8 did little to change the fundamental rights granted to same-sex couples. “Is it still your view,” she asked Shannon Minter, the legal director of the National Center for Lesbian Rights, “that the sky has fallen as a result of Proposition 8?”
Barack Obama is getting less left with each passing day.
You liberals thought the 77 days from election to inauguration would be a joyful procession to the mantle of power, each day filled with events, symbolic or otherwise, pointing toward release and liberation from the dark years of George W.
It hasn't happened. As you stand there, open-mouthed, aghast at some of your standard-bearer's appointments, conservatives across the board have praised them. John McCain "applauds" the President-elect. The Weekly Standard sees him continuing "the course set by Bush..." Well shit, how much worse can it get?
A lot worse. This much worse.
See that guy next to him? That's Rick Warren, pastor of the hugest fundie megachurch in Orange County, California. He is rich and he is famous. How famous is he? He's so famous Oprah recommended his book. How rich is he? His book has sold 20 million copies.
He is against abortion. He is against homosexual marriage. And he is going to deliver the invocation at Barack Obama's inauguration.
The point is, Barack could have asked almost any clergyman and almost any clergyman would have said yes. It's a signal honor to deliver the invocation at the inauguration. You get to pray for the country on live television before a world audience in hi-def.
But he asked Rick Warren.
What does it mean for Californians?
For starters, it means all the sore losers out there can't count on the White House for help in getting Prop 8 overturned. Looks like it's here to stay.
Somewhere, right now, a million Mormons are laughing their asses off.
It got me to thinking about the first time I heard that word. And I recall it was in Esquire in 1965. Terry Southern wrote a satirical article entitled, Terry Southern Interviews A Faggot Male Nurse. The interview may have been invented. Who knows? Terry Southern was a wild and crazy guy. Here's part of it:
In the interview, after a lot of semantic backing and forthing, they settle on "gay" as the operative word.
And I remembered, that's the first time I ever heard "gay" used "that way." Because, in 1965, there was the "other way." As in this Sinatra tune...
And I feel so gay
In a melancholy way,
That it might as well be spring
It might as well be spring.
or this one...
Love is tearful or it's gay
It's a problem or it's play
It's a heartache either way
But beautiful.
There's this tedious old bloggette who styles herself Queen of Spain. Claims to have been an award-winning journalist. Perhaps she was. Who knows? They give awards for all kinds of things: ugliest dog, most hideously-unique disability, coolest camel toe, you name it.
So let's all agree she was a journalist. Was. An award-winning journalist even. So what has she done for us lately? Not much, it seems. Oh, she putters around the house. Picks at the keyboard. Gets in everyone's way. Makes a general nuisance of herself. And when things blow up in her goofy face, she vents her spleen. All over the page.
Most recently, she seems to be having a hair up her ass about the Prop 8 supporters. Here's a sample of her vented spleen. Brace yourself. It's not a pretty sight:
Suck? Fuck? Bastards? Geez, Erin. Stop sugarcoating. Lay it on the line.
For those of you who care, here's the rant in its entirety along with the 200-plus saccharine comments from her pathetically-fawning fans. It's a riveting page-turner. I suggest you read it aloud to someone you're about to break up with. It'll hasten the process.
Queen of Spain reminds me of Mary Tyler Moore. Not the young Mary we all knew and loved on television. Not even the 40-something Mary. I mean the cranky old Mary of the nineties, in her posh Park Avenue digs with, as Bob Dylan would put it, "her fog, her amphetamine and her pearls."
Let me set the scene. It was January 1996 and I was living in New Jersey working in radio and we had a major Winter storm. It was so bad the roads were shut down for three days. And, lo and behold, one Channel 4 newscaster trainee, reporting live from a subway station in the Burbs and no doubt freezing her tush off, was caught on camera wearing a fur coat. My letter to the editor tells the rest of the story:
The editor changed "fuck" to "muck." It's like life, Queenie. You can't have everything your way. Sometimes you have to take what they give. Go along to get along. "Whether you like it or not," as Gavin Newsom would put it.
And most of the time, it's okay to take it. After all, "muck" does get the point across, doesn't it?
I've decided to nominate Kate Kendall as the Yes on Prop 8 Buttgirl. Kate's the Executive Director of the National Center for Lesbian Rights and a huge opponent of Prop 8. She's my Buttgirl because she hasn't the class, style or good taste to concede defeat. Like the song says:
You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, Know when to walk away and know when to run. You never count your money when you're sittin' at the table. There'll be time enough for countin' when the dealin's done.
Here's Kate at the NO ON 8 headquarters, agonizing over the gloomy numbers as the votes are tallied. Think you can come up with a caption? I sure can...
-If there's anything l can do....
-I really shouldn't impose on you.
-No, really. Anything.
-It's just that I. I don't think l should be alone tonight.
But enough of wit and humor. Back to the election aftermath. With 97% of the votes counted and a Prop 8 defeat out of reach and every news service in the country declaring the yes side the winner, Kate and some eunuch named Geoff issued this press release...
Classy, huh?
So what are the No on 8 dweebs doing now that their Dignity Diddle is in deadly disarray?
For starters, they trashed West Hollywood last night. Real bright. Took a dump on their own neighborhood. That'll sure as fuck show the rest of us who's boss!
Then they marched on the Latter Day Saints Church in Westwood. Seems someone told them Prop 8 is a Mormon Conspiracy to take control of the KNOWN UNIVERSE. I contacted one of the March Organizers, a Mister Matthew Bader (pictured below), who explained it's not just the Mormons. It's plots within plots within plots, yielding up a classic inside-the-beltway circle jerk connecting the dots between politicians, lobbyists, shadowy foreign nationals, POWs and Islamic terrorists, not to mention Asian Power Broker Joker Arroyo and fugitive Mafia Financier Frank"Frankie Five Angels" Pentangelo and the late Jimmy Hoffa and Lee Harvey Oswald. It seems the Colombian Cocaine Kingpins and the Israeli Arms Dealers are in the mix as well. And oh yeah, there's a sinister back-channel money-laundering scheme to finance Brenda's amnesia operation so she can remember what Lance told her about Heather's motel rendezvous with Drake on the day Monica put strychnine in Lizbeth's gumbo and...
Back in 2000, it was Proposition 22. It passed overwhelmingly, by an asskickingly huge margin. You'd think when someone gets a major asskicking, they'd go away and stay away. You'd think that, wouldn't you? But it seems we really do live in dumbdown times. They're fucking baa-aack. For more of the same.
Pretty simple, huh? And like Jewel once said, "What's simple is true."
Good news, by the way. Looks like it's gonna pass. Here's the summary of the just-completed Marist Poll:
According to the latest poll from California, those fighting for the defense of traditional marriage have a nine point advantage over activists seeking state recognition of same-sex marriage.
The poll released on Tuesday afternoon reports that the drive to pass Proposition 8 is leading among likely voters 52 to 43 percent. If Proposition 8 passes, it will amend the state Constitution to say, “Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid and recognized in the state of California.”
The poll also shows that Proposition 8 leads in every region of California except the San Francisco Bay Area, where 58% are opposed to the measure.
Fifty two percent of likely California voters believe the ruling was wrong to have overturned the 2000 referendum (Proposition 22) in which voters approved reserving marriage for opposite-sex couples, and 72 percent believe the decision should be left to the voters, the poll found.
The Marist College Institute of Public Opinion, which conducted the poll between September 28 and October 5, 2008, also uncovered some results that point to the cultural and moral uncertainty surrounding the controversial issue of homosexual marriage. For instance, more than half of the 43 percent against the bill said they were likely to change their mind when reminded that Proposition 8 would not affect same-sex couples’ ability to form civil unions. Moreover, 88 percent of those in favor of civil unions said they viewed marriage as between one man and one woman.
Pollsters also found that when the implications for religious freedom were considered, the voting patterns changed. Close to one third of those voting "no" on 8 and a significant number of undecided voters – would be more likely to vote "yes" if the proposition’s failure were to compromise the tax exempt status of religious schools or if children in public schools were taught that marriage was a relationship “between any two adults.”
Other results showed that 49 percent of likely voters believe that if clergy or religious institutions were threatened with lawsuits or the loss of their tax-exempt status, then same-sex marriage should not be recognized.
Additionally, 79 percent of all likely voters believe that if Proposition 8 fails, clergy should not be required to perform same-sex marriages if it violates their religious convictions.
Sounds like someone's gonna get another asskicking. Again. Some people never learn.
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