Sunday

JEREMY SHOCKEY'S NEW YEARS EVE PARTY....

There's this football player everyone detests. He's pretty good, but he's loud and arrogant. He was born and raised in Ada, OK (population: 6½). He matriculated at the University of Miami AKA "The U", not exactly your basic Harvard or Princeton. So it's safe to say he's dumb-as-dirt (think of a white version of Chad Ochocinco). Here's his picture...

js saint

Gross and grosser!

So last December, this ad appeared on Craig's List:

shockey ny party

I look upon such missives as challenges. I responded with uncommon alacrity...

shockey ny party letter1

I signed it "Jessica Judd" after two of the lamest women in show business (I figured that would entice him). I searched the web for a pic sufficiently low rent to appeal to Ada Oklahoma's favorite son and a gifted scholar from "The U"...

Jessica Judd

Alas. I never heard from him. All that work for naught. Oh well...





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4 comments:

Anonymous said...

"I sneak out of my cousin's apartment to take the bus to downtown Seattle, where we fuck in the park..."
...
"...and believe it or not I am still a virgin."

...Huh. I choose "or not". I bet that had something to do with his failure to respond.

playwrighter said...

When your boyfriend's name is Craphonso, you have an extra-special set of problems...

Taylor said...

Chords in song text, and lyrics falling on chord transitions, are monospaced and bolded. play piano by ear book cd play piano on the computer keyboard download Do they stylize a fastidious cut of composition and mess about it with feeling.

playwrighter said...

Fastidious. That describes Jeremy to a T, Taylor...